Assassination attempt on Sergei Putanov fails
BREAKING NEWS: An assassination attempt on Russian domain billionaire, Sergei Putanov, has been averted.
Our correspondent in Ekaterinburg, Nikolai Domienenko reports:
The investor and technology industries in Russia were in shock today, after news of a failed attempt to assassinate popular domain billionaire, Sergei Putanov, was made public.
ITAR-TASS reports that Sergei Putanov escaped uninjured from a provocative attempt to deliver explosives at his residence, under the disguise of specialty pizza. Sergei Putanov, one of the most influential domain investors in the world, left a short statement before heading to a private clinic for evaluation:
“Today mark day war start against criminal. You know who you are. I break leg all of you. Sergei when promise, Sergei deliver. My word is a sword for Russian Bear Investments. Criminal, Ёб твою мать!”
Sergei Putanov is expected to return to his office at Russian Bear Investments tomorrow, with increased security consisting of 12 bodyguards and an entourage of buxom Ukrainian models. The assassination attempt against Sergei Putanov is yet another indication of his fearsome investments in Dubai-Florida, the A Mile High Club adult entertainment service and dot .prostitute gTLD coming soon from ICANN.
The shocking news will have an impact on today’s NYSE closing, which is expected to rise, after the assassination attempt against the Russian domain mogul was foiled.