Father Domainicus: The Babel Tower of gTLDs

Greetings and salutations, my brothers and sisters in domaining – this is Father Domainicus, on a rather dull but still glorious Sunday afternoon.

Many a domain investor asked me, what is it with the new gTLDs that make them appealing to the general public?

Usually, I respond to such inquisitive minds with a quick, loving caress of their cheeks and a brotherly smile, then I proceed with answering the question in a manner befitting my stature as the medium and representative of our Domain Lord.

Father Domainicus preaches love.

Father Domainicus preaches love.

The general public is a reference to those outside of the community of our Domain Church; these are the lost souls that need guidance and a helping hand, all while they attempt to live their dreams of entrepreneurship and business expansion.

Tell me, my domaining children, how is this possible, when all the best and most suitable domain names, have long been registered, not by the general public, but by the Merchants of Babylon who are whoring themselves for almost 20 years!

Oh, how do I dream of a day when every young businessman or businesswoman would simply obtain her dream domain keyword without hassle, without being harassed from the evil merchants that are seeking their pound of flesh!

And thus, I perceive gTDLs to be the Resurrection of our Domain Church, a liberation from the shackles of digital slavery – a wave of freedom that one should simply ride, as Brother Frank Schilling quoteth.

Hell and damnation awaits those that scorn this widening of our Domain Church, that was achieved through blood, sweat, tears and other bodily fluids secreted by the hard-working teams of the Internet Church of Anointed New Nazareth, our beloved brothers and sisters at ICANN.

As domain investors, you are thus advised to tread carefully, for this new joint venture is not yet another “business as usual” – it is liberation for the souls of the general users, who want to obtain meaningful addresses for their brands.

It is not meant to pillage, rape and sodomize other people’s wallets – I hope I am making this clear for you!

Rest assured, that once you understand and follow my words, the world will be a better place for you to conduct business and engage in joint ventures with other men and women in our Domain Church, exactly as the Domain Lord meant it to be, all along.

Next Sunday I shall be attending the Super Bowl, and thus, I renew my rendezvous for two weeks from now. I leave you with a loving embrace that lingers just long enough to energize your body and soul with the love and spirit of our Domain Church. Amen.

~Father Domainicus.

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