What would happen at TRAFFIC New York if Bernie Madoff ran the show?
Think for a second, kid.
What would happen if that ponzi scheme genius – Bernie Madoff - ran the show at TRAFFIC New York?
Well, if Bernie were in charge, all domainers would be sent via overnight FedEx courier a contract outlining the opportunities presented at the top domainers’ conference, contained in a fine leather portfolio with Madoff’s initials.
Well-hidden in the legal mumbo-jumbo, the exclusivity of the contract would extend past the domainer’s lifetime, surrendering 50% of the PPC revenue and 25% commission per annum in the event of a sale.
Then, the initial TRAFFIC gathering would feature a splendid gala including famous artists, painters, pianists and a prima donna; local and foreign politicians and military officials would attend the party launching the event, where champagne, caviar and rare culinary delicacies from Samoa and Afghanistan would be offered. Dessert would include no less than 20 varieties of cake and pastries, six coffee flavors and complimentary Cuban cigars.
If Bernie ran TRAFFIC New York there would be ladies in long gowns and gents in tuxedos, and half the newspaper journalists of New York would be covering the event about Madoff’s spectacular entrance into the domain territory. Both Time and Fortune magazines would have their own corner booths and Readers’ Digest would dedicate its entire edition to domain names – the real estate of the 21st century.
Domain auctions would be held on behalf of Sotheby’s and 1% of all proceeds would be donated to the Lappin Charitable Foundation, the Jewish Diaspora of New York, the Sons of Ruth and David and various other funds. Each domain auctioned would come with its own certificate of ownership, printed on parchment harvested from the finest Lebanese sheep and bearing the Bernie Madoff Golden Seal of authenticity.
If Bernie Madoff ran the TRAFFIC show, the entire world would find out about domaining, its role in the world economy and the ability of everyone to freely trade domains as commodities. The entire world would open its mind to education about domains and would begin to contribute their energy, wealth and knowledge to an industry that’s currently painfully self-centered and ostensibly self-absorbed.
Only problem is, Bernie Madoff will be in prison for the next 150 years; the domain industry appears to be in trouble for equally as many years to come.