No need to be shy any longer, if you have adult domain names you can be issued a certificate of absolution

There is some great news for holders of embarrassing, adult domain name portfolios.

In a unanimous decision by ICANN, all registrants of adult domains can now apply for what ICANN calls a “certificate of absolution” – a clearance document that enables such domains to not be classified as adult any longer.

“I think it’s a great move by ICANN”, says Spyro Papadopoulos, chairman of the ‘Domainers for ICANN’ committee. “This doubles the opportunities for a sale, as these adult domain names can now be listed in the non-adult forums, auctions and other such sales venues. For once, ICANN does something right!”

ICANN endorses the local Registries to pass the cost of certification onto the registrants, through the Registrars. Confused yet?

You shouldn’t be, as it’s rather simple.

ICANN will be receiving $1 for every registration of adult domains, based on an extensive dictionary of words; thus, enabling the certification of those who apply for it. The cost will be covered by increasing domain registration fees worldwide.

“We’re always looking for opportunities to expand our relationships with investors worldwide”, said Lucinda Tamales, a spokesperson for ICANN. “At ICANN we need the extended cash-flow in order to invest in the future via the expansion of our infrastructure. And it doesn’t hurt to visit overseas often!”, she added while boarding a plane for an ICANN meeting in the French Riviera.

Certificates of absolution for adult domain names will begin to be issued in March of next year, to match the price increases in registration fees by ICANN.

No more references to cusswords in domain names, thanks to an obscure book first published two millennia ago

Pittsburgh, PA – The Unassociated Press

It could not happen at a worse time; ICANN announced today that it’s amending its Letter of Authorization (LOA) to all Registries, including Verisign and PIR.

The amendment revokes article BC1922/C/1995 that allows for the registration of domains which fall in the “cussword” category. In particular, article 7B of the amendment states:

“Registries are allowed to permit registrations of any textual string, regardless of the ethical or moral references to acts that would be socially unacceptable or even punishable by law, by means of invoking the Freedom of Speech protocol; Geneva 21/200KL, as described in the associated documentation herein.”

This entire paragraph has now been stricken out leaving the determination of which domains can be accepted for registration to the Registries; in essence, this means that each Registry will now decide by majority vote whether to permit domains such as sex.com, porn.com, ass.com and suckmebeautiful.org to remain registered.

In a memo to both Verisign and PIR, ICANN justifies this policy change as an event related to extreme pressure from the Religious Right, a group of conservatives that have been lobbying the ICANN members for such an action against “immoral domain names.”

According to Stephanie McPherson-Peters, executive director of WOWNow International – a freedom of speech watchdog agency – ICANN members could not but succumb to this pressure:

“It is unfortunate that we should forget about freedom of speech and such imaginary claims to democracy; the ICANN members acted upon extreme fear of losing their travel benefits and meal coupons. I think it’s a dark day for the Internet.”

ICANN will begin to reclaim all cussword domains before the end of the year; this should be enough time for their owners to surrender the domains through the respective Registries and receive in exchange a free dinner for two at Domino’s Pizza, along with a hardbound copy of The Holy Bible.

Frank Schilling does not need domain coupons but he lives in paradise

What a better way to end a beautiful Friday, other than by giving out some great discount codes or workarounds for several major domain registrars!

These are hard to find these days, especially with ICANN eating up most of the fees like a rabid rat! Use them wisely and pass them around, the more people use them, the better your savings will be!

Remember: save the Amazon by not printing this page; use copy & paste instead.

We asked Frank Schilling to send us his ultimate registrar coupons and freebies list; unfortunately, he was busy, so we compiled our own.

GoDaddy
Skip to page 14 of the registration process and enter code TITTIES4ALL

Network Solutions
Call NetSol up and successfully decipher the tech support person’s nationality (you only have 3 attempts) and win a free domain.

Register.com
Use the code BADUSERINTERFACE somewhere in the menu – not sure where.

eNom
Call eNom, press #99 for the operator, ask for technical support. When they ask for your name, address and password, cuss out loud twice then you’ll be transferred to the legal department. A 50/50 chance of a freebie awaits you there.

Registerfly
Enter code SPAMMERSRUS – re-enter if it fails. If it fails still, call 1.800.SUCKYREG

Fabulous
Call Mike “Fabulous” Robertson at 2:00pm Eastern Time – that’s 3:00am local time in Australia. Mike will be groggy and will gladly give you a free coupon to let him go back to sleep. Don’t forget to end the call with “G’nite mate”.

Moniker
First, log into you account, then select Domains. Go to My Preferences, My Secret codes and copy the authentication code. Email support@moniker with that code. Wait. Wait some more. Wait some more. Wait until you see your kids grow. Log into your account and pay regular price.