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A Reminder to all Male Domainers: Next Sunday is Valentine’s Day

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Nothing like a reminder by your girlfriend or wife that you’ve missed Valentine’s!

She will be dropping hints left and right a month in advance: “Oh honey, I really crave some chocolates!” or “Look at that sparkly ring at Zales, isn’t it pretty?”

But no, what do you do, you keep on registering useless domains like JoeAndGinaLoveForever.com

Guys, listen up.

Tomorrow might be Super Bowl Sunday but next Sunday is Valentines. No matter if your team wins tomorrow, your ass will be toast if you don’t remember to “touchdown” next week.

Here’s how your schedule will look like this week:

Sunday: Super Bowl Sunday, lots of beer and chicken wings, hanging out with buddies. Lots of burping and tossing stuff around.

Monday: Still having a hungover from Super Bowl Sunday? Too bad. Drink lots of water, get your ass out of bed.

Tuesday: Don’t go registering any domains now. Take a visit to your local Lady Godiva store and get the chocolates she craved. Depending on the seriousness of your relationship, now it’s the time to go get that bling she’s been eyeballing.

Wednesday: Time to get her a card. Wal-Mart cards don’t cut it, bud. Go to a specialty store or a bookstore. Get a nice, non-cheesy card without any nudity on. It should cost more than $5, in case you wondered; that’s still less than a useless “romantic” domain registration fee.

Thursday: Sit your restless domainer ass down and write her a letter to go with the card. A letter, not email. Yes, that thing one writes on paper, with a pen. Make it one page long and don’t cheat now; a drawn heart should not take up half a page.

Friday: Make sure you’ve arranged for flowers, or else you’ll be looking like every other Joe Blow fool at the supermarket on Sunday, scrambling for that last, pathetic bouquet. Call your local florist and arrange for a surprise delivery.

Saturday: Better get those plans about a romantic dinner ready. I know you’re tempted to go register a sappy, silly, sweet and useless domain for her. Don’t do it. Plan the dinner at a nice restaurant, somewhere that she likes even if you don’t. Make a reservation – that’s the way to do it.

Valentine’s Day: It’s time to do your duty and present your sweetie with all the work of your week, per the above. Only then, you can rest and carry on registering useless domains.


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Comments

6 Responses to “A Reminder to all Male Domainers: Next Sunday is Valentine’s Day”
  1. BullS says:

    Pray that you get to do the victory “touchdown” !!!! that nite

  2. Patrick McDermott says:

    Very nice tutorial except…

    It’s very easy to mix up the Valentine’s card or the note included with the Valentine’s chocolate intended for your girlfriend with the one intended for your wife.

    Unless your wife and girlfriend share the same name it’s best to avoid names altogether.

    Use a generic salutation like “My Love” or something similar.

    This way any mix up won’t result in disaster.

    If your girlfriend and wife happen to be the same person more power to you.

    That’s the way to go!

    The above advice is especially appropriate for Tiger Woods as he has many, many girlfriends in addition to his one wife.

  3. Jim Holleran says:

    Been married for 12 years and no matter what I do on Feb 14th, my wife still gives me shit on Feb 15th as always. Women has very short memories when it comes to nice things:)

  4. Tia Wood says:

    As a woman domainer, I feel the obligation to set the record straight and help you guys out.

    Sunday: Watching the game? Too damn bad. Her favorite restaurant needs at least a week advance reservation. Turn off the TV and start reserving.

    Monday: Hungover? Please. These feet are not going to massage themselves.

    Tuesday: Screw chocolates. AdamAndEve.com <-NSFW. The gift that keeps on giving.

    Wednesday: Cards are a cop-out when you aren't creative enough to write a 5+ page love letter which describes how she is the most awesome, beautiful thing on planet Earth. If you never tapped into your "feelings", be prepared to do so now. (LovingYou.com has love notes you can plagiarize).

    Thursday – Saturday: Take over the house chores. All of them. No bitching, either. Let her prop her feet up and drink beer while she manizes over your cute ass.

    Valentineโ€™s Day: You forgot to order flowers. Oh, well. She will forget about it by the time the order comes in from AdamAndEve.com (NSFW). If you don't kiss her ass today be prepared to pay for it tomorrow. And the next day. And the next day. And the next.

  5. Singh says:

    Sadly, but required to be persent in LA next week ๐Ÿ™ due to valentines day. However I love my valentine because this is the girl who got me started in to domaining and web development and always encouraged me to do so. Once I have lost my faith in web dev and domaining, but she cheered me up and I now make money without putting much of time etc. I can say, I love domaining because she encouraged me and always helped me to live for my dreams.

    You know I think sometime you do need a person in your life who keeps you encouraged for something that want to live for rest of your life. Ofcourse it is domaining that I want to live for, but i could be away from it by now, if my gf would not in my life.

    So i cant live without both. ๐Ÿ™‚

    So this year, I will register her a Domain name, and little web page instead of a greeting card ๐Ÿ™‚ I hope its a nice idea.

  6. Anunt says:

    But no, what do you do, you keep on registering useless domains like JoeAndGinaLoveForever.com
    hahahahahaha!!!

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