I was at the Black Friday vigil and all I got was this lousy domain!

At the crack of dawn I was outside Best Buy to get the latest super games console for $29 less.

The people around me were of various ages: teenagers, soccer moms with their exercise gear on, dads that wished they were watching football and eating Thanksgiving leftovers instead.

The line stretched for a block and a half, and by 5:00 am we were rushed to the doors.

Everybody yelled and screamed, the sections where the deals were advertised were filled with personnel, to handle the mob. People were yelling at eachother, families were tied together with colored elastic bands that threatened to choke any incoming violator of their personal space.

It was like being at the Colosseum at the peak of the gladiators’ time. The crowds wanted blood.

The Black Friday Fights aren't worth it.

“Damn it, Trisha, grab that blue-ray recorder, quick!”, yelled a fat guy with a Playstation 3 under each arm.

His wife or girlfriend, a sizable heffer with hair extensions, rushed to the DVD section – only to be tackled by a group of pimply teenagers that held “Harry Potter” videogames as their prized possessions.

I stood waiting for my turn, not daring to rush into the traffic of human hippos, lions and elephants.

As I managed to grab the last remaining copy of Adobe CS5, a BestBuy employee pinched my wrist and took it away. “Sorry dude, this is for my sister who studies web design at Fullsail. You lose!”

Thirty minutes later, the crowds had left behind a floor littered with trash, tissues, empty soda containers and other such evidence of their “civilized” passing through.

As I left the store empty-handed, I went home to register BlackFridayFights.com as the sole reminder of my Black Friday visit to the store. As I was about to hit the Submit button, GoDaddy’s message informed me that the name was “anti-consumer” and that they’d have to charge me $1 more.

I closed the browser immediately and went to make some coffee, before my neighbors came over to claim my last pot of java as theirs.

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9 Responses to “I was at the Black Friday vigil and all I got was this lousy domain!”
  1. Poor Uncle says:

    That’s really funny. Good luck next year!

  2. .pH says:

    I do not appreciate this comment you made about me…

    “His wife or girlfriend, a sizable heffer with hair extensions…”

    I’ll have you know that is my real hair!

  3. Lucius "Guns" Fabrice says:

    Poor Uncle – Next year I will make sure I wear a gladiator’s outfit.

    .pH – I hope the “Harry Potter” teenagers didn’t tackle you too hard on the linoleum floor 😀

  4. Cole says:

    While those in Americaland are out lining up in hopes of buying something completely unnecessary, we Canadians are relaxing with copious amounts of beer and family-sized poutines.

  5. Lucius "Guns" Fabrice says:

    Cole – I think Canadians are smarter: you guys settle things by shotgunning beer 😀

  6. John says:

    My wife woke me up at 4:30am this morning. I stumbled into the bathroom and registered: BlackFridaySucks.com and IHateBlackFriday.com….

    weirdly the IHateBlackFriday.com domain immediately had traffic lololol

  7. Robin Ong says:

    Hehe….of all the domainers, you are the most homourous. Thanks for the entertaining post.

  8. F black friday.

    I was in line once, I vowed to never again put myself through that.

  9. Lucius "Guns" Fabrice says:

    That’s nothing, compared to what some shoppers went through.

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