Several domainers from California have checked in the San Diego Regional Hospital’s disease control clinic, citing side effects from alcoholic drinks consumed this past January.
“We’re looking into possible exposure to a mysterious substance called ‘agent purple’, that interacts with the patient’s melanin receptors,” said Dr. Tricia Cummings of the SDRH.
“The change in color – a rather deep purple – can be initiated by chemicals introduced to the human body via the consumption of mass quantities of free alcohol,” added Dr. Cummings.
According to the report, all four cases were admitted independently; the patients initially complained of a purple-colored skin irritation in the wrist area, where they wore the bracelet passes, giving them access to a XYZ sponsored party.
The XYZ event took place during NamesCon in January; the patients changed color rather recently, coinciding with the revelations of gTLD registration number-tweaking by Network Solutions and XYZ.
“Stress, anxiety and certain predisposition to corporate propaganda can lead to acute melanin mutation,” said Dr. Tricia Cummings, adding: “I have no doubt those patients read a lot of news about XYZ recently, and allowed their immune system to surrender. We are treating each case independently.”
There is no doubt that the ‘agent purple’ coloration effect is causing some of the patients’ social activity to be reduced, but one thing is certain: they will most likely find a job as “purple people” working at XYZ.
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