The Domain Future: Domainer Almanac 2011

‘Tis the season to be jolly; it’s also time for us to share the numerous, exciting predictions about the domain industry in the new year, 2011!

Without further ado, we present you the 2011 Edition of the prestigious DomainGang Domainer Almanac! 😀

• Rick Schwartz publishes his first book, titled “How to free yourself from pigeons and influence people”. More than 12,000 copies sell on the first day on Amazon.com, an instant best-seller. The book comes with a free Rick Schwartz bobblehead doll.
• Howard Neu retires from the legal profession and opens a domainer celebrity restaurant in West Palm Beach. Unleashing his creativity as master chef, Howard goes on to create dishes that everyone loves, such as “UDRP Escargot”, the “veal a la Dot Co” and the “Trademark Dish Pute” soup.
• Monte Cahn decides to become the new spokesman for OXI Clean, appearing in numerous TV commercials. His cunning ability to sell is finally put to good use, with more than 100,000 bottles of OXI Clean and ShamWow items being sold for $19.95 each (shipping not included).
• The .CO Registry announces the release of all 63 letter combination .CO domains, catching thousands of domain investors unprepared for this unique opportunity. By releasing the longest possible .CO domains in existence, the .CO Registry makes millions from this monopoly and subsequent craze.
• Mike Berkens launches a new web site, TheTheDomains.com – catering to domainers that stutter. By tapping into this unexplored territory, Mike announces that other “TheThe” registrations will follow; clearly a unique approach to capturing ttttttypo-traffic.
• Francois Carrillo of Domaining.com introduces CrapDomains.com  – the marketplace for the worst possible domains in existence. Always a serious investor with a humorous side, Francois uses the motto “Domains so crap you’d have to pay the buyer!”
• Elliot Silver has huge success with DomainQuestions.com and  launches several other web sites that aim to answer questions in other markets, such as DogWalkerQuestions.com and BahamasQuestions.co – the databases currently hold two million questions and about seventy-five answers.
• Chef Patrick decides that he wants to become a full time sailor, after the success of his DNCruise. Sporting a captain’s cap and white shirt all day long, he finally tells his wife that he’s off to the high seas to live life like a true pirate, drinking Captain Morgan rum and looking for booty.
• Frank Schilling shaves his head completely and everybody begins to wonder if Ammar Kubba is a bad influence on Frank’s looks. From the warm waters of the Caribbean, Frank continues to blog once every other blue moon, sending out beams of wisdom and thankfully he won’t repeat the Note.com blunder again.
• Tia Wood – after winning Domainer of the Year – she appears on various morning shows, to teach the women of America about domain development and in the process discuss philosophy and martial arts. Some compromising pictorial that surfaces only boosts her popularity to stratospheric heights.
• Sedo buys Google, thus ending the argument over whether their new ajax-generated content is being spidered or not. With the remainder of their positive cashflow, Sedo organizes domainer events in 157 cities in the US and 274 abroad; clearly an indication of a booming domainer market.
• Hank Alvarez becomes a spokesperson for ICANN. The ultra-smart entrepreneur who generated millions of dollars with his domain auction platform is recognized as one of the 100 most influential domainers of all time.
• Epik launches the Ultimate Superdev Maker – a platform that generates fully developed web sites in seconds – for the lowly price of $4,950. The biggest advantage of the Ultimate Superdev Maker is its ability to hide its code from Google’s bots; the resulting web sites cannot be banned from the search engines, ever, not even if one asks Google to remove them from its index.
• Shane Cultra of DomainShane.com buys Tree.com for an undisclosed amount of Bellagio chips and retires a happy man. The ever-busy domain investor launches a virtual pet game where players can now take care of their tree, watching it grow and become tall and full of leaves and fruit.
• Ron Jackson decides to stop publishing DNJournal and buys back his old record store in Florida. With vinyl becoming so rare – almost extinct – Ron invests in some ultra high grade vinyl that is worth millions of dollars. As part of his retirement, Ron continues being the official reporter of TRAFFIC and Domainfest.
• Mike Cohen launches Doughmains.com – a domain development laboratory for hand-made designs. Finally moving away from WordPress stuff, Mike plans to roll, bake and stylize his designs by hand. Just like dough.

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