Father Domainicus: ICANN’t get no satisfaction

The domain end is near, says Father Domainicus.

Embrace North Koreans, says Father Domainicus.

Greetings and salutations, my brothers and sisters in Domaining; this is Father Domainicus with a post-Easter message.

What a fine Sunday it is today, except that we might be seeing some North Korean nuclear-capable missiles across the western skies. Hopefully, our Domain Lord will diffuse those radical acts of global terror, raining down fire above the 38th parallel.

In a similar fashion, we are seeing daily what a fine job ICANN has done to prepare everyone for a cluster of dozens of new gTLDs.  Alas, I am only kidding, for ICANN has brought a wave of thoughtless acts into the global Internet, as if it were operated by Kim Jong Un. It’s pure madness!

In all seriousness, I cannot foresee how this is going to work, with objections to new gTLDs seeing the light of day; I was under the impression that surely, with the hundreds of millions of dollars under the control of ICANN, they would be able to hire a few programmers from Bangladesh or China to get things going.

Still, I have faith in my heart, my domainer children. As our Domain Lord said a long time ago, and I quote:

“Fear not the end, for it is a new beginning, when glory upon thee brings the joys of the unknown.”

I have yet to see a more positive message than this, and I would loosely interpret it as such: grin and bear it, you will eventually like it.

Some of you might believe that I just committed sacrilege by unfolding the word of our Domain Lord in a manner that reeks of playfulness, but I can assure you, our Lord knows the difference between scornful remarks and innocent humor.

And with that in mind, I shall now return to my quarters to finish off a bottle of holy communion wine; it’s a privilege that we men of the cloth have.

Onwards and upwards, with love.

~Father Domainicus.

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