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ICANN: Relaunch of the entire com/net/org namespace feasible

ICANN claims domains can co-exist in multiple dimensions.

ICANN might be facing problems launching the gTLD namespace, what with the TAS Labs product being meticulously repaired – but the Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers isn’t short of any new ideas.

“People are complaining, that even with the launch of gTLDs there isn’t enough opportunity for those born in recent years to grab premium domains in com, net and org,” said Frances Bacon on behalf of ICANN.

“So we ran some tests with physicists in CERN Switzerland and it seems feasible to utilize Einstein’s theory in DNS”, added Bacon, shuffling her papers for another press conference.

The method of quantum domain resolutionor QDR for short – would require the construction of a parallel universe, albeit in domains.

The co-existence, in other words, of the same domains in different dimensions.

With careful QDR programming, Facebook.com would be both a social network and a gag site to post awkward pictures of childhood, for example.

“No doubt at ICANN and particularly, TAS Labs, we employ some of the finest minds in the domain industry,” said the CEO, Rod Beckstrom.

“Despite my departure from ICANN in a couple of months, I’m very excited that this happens during my watch and very proud of the ICANN employees, colleagues, friends, sponsors and my cousins in Albuquerque – hey, Stan and Stacey!” added Beckstrom, waving to the camera.

Quantum domain resolution is expected to revolutionize browsers as well; Mozilla is already working on the beta version of Firefox QDR and Microsoft is taking slow but sure steps as well.

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5 Responses to “ICANN: Relaunch of the entire com/net/org namespace feasible”
  1. rathead says:

    does domain gang have a hand sign i could flash so just in case i run across any other domain bangers on the street we don’t start bidding on the same name?

  2. Lucius "Gunz" Fabrice says:

    Yo, rathead. Listen man, here at south side we don’t flash no bling, ya feel me? But in another dimension, we be off da chain, yo.

  3. Fabbo Tabbo says:

    Thats fantastic about the relaunch. I just rushed to hand register:

    quantum domain resolution (com).

    Ill bet its worth trillions for the new Internet that is coming!

    I also registered:

    bogusstory (com) for that waste of time story.

  4. Lucius "Gunz" Fabrice says:

    Fabbo Tabbo – Glad you entered the 15th dimension using ICANN’s white paper “How to time jump back to 1994”.

    You forgot to register HumorlessBozo (com) though. 😉

  5. Fabbo Tabbo says:

    Hi – I’m a time-wasting moron from Bangor, Maine with an IP and I tried to talk shit about your post. My sincere apologies!

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