Another year of empty promises has begun; we’re already on the second day of 2014 and domain investors resisting change are proclaiming the victory of the old .com guard.
“Where are the successful launches of gTLD domains, eh Donuts?” asked domain investor Billy Weiner, who invests in .com domains and bobblehead figures.
“I have yet to see a single sale of a dot .Whatever domain name, so clearly the gTLD scam is a bust!” exclaimed Weiner, frantically selling .com domains and used bobbleheads on eBay.
Thousands of domainers eager to announce the apparent failure of gTLDs declared their triumphant victory today, January 2nd, picketing the offices of ICANN in Brussels, Los Angeles and Washington DC.
Using the hashtag #gtldfail, they occupied domain street en masse.
“I think those claims that gTLDs will be successful in 2014 are clearly lies and outlandish propaganda by Google, Frank Schilling and the Donut mafia,” said domain investor Sherman Dickens, who parks 100% of his domains.
“No .tattoo registrations, no .cooking domains live, it’s already 2014 – what the hell is going on here people?” added Dickens, who is an avid supporter of .com domains and a successful bingo champion.
Facing defeat and disgrace by the status quo, dozens of gTLD registries announced that they consider reverting to .com and will potentially consider suing ICANN for broken promises and shattered dreams.
