North Korea threatens to shut down the Internet!

Kim Jong Un said "FoKoYo" to all Americans and the Internet.

Kim Jong Un said “FoKoYo” to all Americans and the Internet.

In a new, brazen statement that reeks of hubris to the world, Kim Jong Unthe North Korean leader-by-birth – announced the imminent destruction of the Internet.

“Capitalist America is corrupting the values of the people of the great Korean nation, and displays hatred towards its great military fighters,” said Kim Jong Un, calmly typing away on his Apple computer.

“With our physical and cultural superiority, we must annihilate the satanic powers of America, including the Internet! Fokoyo America!” he exclaimed, pointing to a map of the US and uttering the Korean word for “f-you”.

In recent weeks, the rhetoric from North Korea has increased substantially, to the point that many believe Kim Jong Un is in fact Sacha Baron Cohen, working undercover on The Dictator 2.

Meanwhile, ICANN is establishing a communications channel with North Korea, at its latest gathering that opened its gates in Beijing, China.

ICANN 46 aims to prevent such dictatorships from threatening the existence of the Internet, which provides the bread and butter of many domain flippers and soccer moms.

The US is monitoring the strategic moves of North Korean missiles closely, ensuring that no shutdown of core Internet services, such as Facebook, Twitter and Google will take place.

All three American corporations are based in California, which is within range of the most advanced North Korean missile, the Ding Dong Un.


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