Having graduated alongside Ron Jackson, domaining success and achieving uber-domainer status is a cinch. Just smile a lot and wear a suit.
Although it can be argued that uber-domainers are not made but are born, this elite class of domain entrepreneurs that well exceed the expectations of average domainers requires a detailed study.
Through their success and passion, such uber-domainers as Frank Schilling, Rick Schwartz, Dr. Kevin Ham – also known as the man who owns the Internet – and as of late, Mike Mann, are propelled into the stratosphere of domainer immortals.
Some of these super-active domainers, tend to renounce the title of uber-domainer and prefer something more apt and worldly when you meet them at domainer social gatherings – just don’t call them “buddy” at the drop of a hat.
We’ve put together a quick guide that could serve as a reference of achieving uber-domainer status, as long as you put in a decent amount of effort and possess the social skills for it.
- Choose a new niche market, e.g. ccTLD IDN domains where it can be easy to excel in without much effort.
- Surround yourself with people that speak positive of you. It doesn’t matter what you say, if you open your mouth as the new ccTLD IDN king, it’ll be gospel to everyone.
- Hang out with important domainers. By “important” we mean key players, such as senior account executives at parking companies. They will connect you to the hidden forces behind each corporation in no time.
- Keep mentioning that you attended high school with domaining publication pioneer, Ron Jackson. If needed, photoshop a picture of your graduation class with your picture next to Ron’s.
- Issue press releases announcing the importance of your niche (e.g. ccTLD IDN) market on the Internet. Hire PR writers in other countries and languages to further solidify your market reach. Repeat as often as needed.
- Find out the favorite restaurant of huge industry celebrities such as Bob Parsons or Ammar Kubba. Be prepared to introduce yourself “by chance” using the phrase, “Filet mignon is so tender here, but domains – that’s what I like to sink my teeth into.”
- Hire beautiful women to be photographed with you in every opportunity for a public appearance. You will be remembered as “the domainer guy” next to the blonde and the brunette at the industry show.
- Invest as little money of your own as possible but always hint that your current project has already utilized six figures and once deployed it will rock the domaining world.
- Form a charity organization – this way you can have a constant flow of people with money for an apparent cause e.g. “Domainers with no limbs due to the Chernobyl accident”. The management of a charity organization will lead to socializing with important people that have money to invest in your real domaining venture.
- Avoid the traps of introducing small fish into your pool. Pretend that you are offering them a piece of the pie but once you’re in the privacy of your office, toss their business cards in the garbage and spam filter their emails. They know you are busy anyway.
- Last but not least: be prepared to lie a lot, but wear a well-pressed suit and smile while doing it.
You forgot one. Pretend you are a very religious person while the real money you make is from porn sites and you too can “own the internet”. All the ass licker’s will fall at your feet and crap their pants in awe when you walk in the room.
“Keep mentioning that you attended high school with domaining publication pioneer, Ron Jackson. If needed, photoshop a picture of your graduation class with your picture next to Ron’s.”
That’s a lot of lying there, hahha!
You got sense of humor Lucius; you will go far without tagging along those lies. :p
This was such a fantastic read! Now which posers will become offended? I love your writing!
TGIF guys! I hope you enjoyed the crash course on uber-domaining 😀 This is education no other college offers currently.
Is there any domainers – who are the major players in the field – who didn’t make it because of internet-porn?
That’s the only fact to be understood, imo.
I attended two more high schools than Rick Schwartz. (i think I recall from Silicon Valley TRAFFIC that he went to 6. I went to 8, two per year.)
Does that count for anything? :>
So glad to find out I’m not the only one that grasps the reality behind many of our industry’s esteemed “Leaders” — and even better to see it in black and white.
Great read, keep up the good work!